Misery and Mirth

Weekend

A month after putting $400+ into fixing my car I had over $800 More done on it this past week. Even though my father swears his mechanic is honest and fair priced I still feel I got screwed. How could you not notice $800 worth of defective/worn out parts + labor when the car was in your shop only a month before? Their excuse” Well you didn’t tell us to look at that”. The Law states a Mechanic has to look over an entire car to ensure its road worthy, safe to drive before releasing it to a customer. Breaks, fuel & break lines are all essential to saftley. Struts can be considered more a “comfort” issue but if they are broke it can create driving hazzards. SIGH! but i got my car back friday and it runs well. Hopefully it will last me another 2 years.

I went to the Detroit Auto Show this past Sunday with Rob & two of his pals. It is funny to observe the difference in how men and women choose vehicles they like. The guys where all about super fast sporty cars or the huge “masculine” trucks? While I and quite a few women I observed seemed more interested in practical aspects like safety features, gas mileage, cargo space and the not so practical “cutness” feature. We were there for 4-5 hours and looked at practically every car, truck and bike. The guys sat in/on many of them and took each others picture. Getting in and out of cars is quite stressful on the hips and I already knew just walking around that long was going to cause me enough pain. So I tried out only a few.
It was fascinating to watch the people who came to this events the different ethnicities, cultures and dress ;Business attire, casual , pimp daddy, unkempt “slob”, Goth, punk and much more, such a vast array of personalities all together to admire the automotives that most of us can’t afford. Everybody got along fine and most people were polite if they bumped you, strangers would make cordial conversation while waiting in line or if they saw a familiar concert shirt discuss music with you. The only person I noticed who was really annoying or sometimes rude was one of the people I came with. I would have preferred to have left him but he drove. It wasn’t such good ideal to let him drive anyway because he almost got us into a serious traffic accident. He was staring at something or someone (prob a girl) and not the traffic stopped ahead of us.  It’s bad that was the only time in my life I have screamed a guy’s name, but it got his attention, he swerved out of the stopped lane of cars with just a few feet to spare and narrowly missing anyone in the next lane. My guardian angels were with me. Once Rob returned his heart to his chest and asked for a change of underwear. He grabbed my still shaking hand, laughed and said Hey you made my girlfriend a screamer.
So not including the double feature I had with Rob on Saturday that was my excitement for the weekend.
Fare well and safe driving.

2005 in review

2005 is finally over and we’re on our way into 2006.  What was my 2005 like? Here’s a review:

I spent the year relatively unemployed. For first 3/4 of the year I made feverous efforts to become employed (the latter 1/4 I’ll discuss in health section.) I signed up with two temp agencies, four online job sites, I’d go through newspaper ads, and went out in person handing out resumes & filling out applications. I did get numerous interviews, the most soul crushing are the ones that start with a phone interview and tell me I am a perfect candidate, and I’ll definitely be hired but for some reason when they see me there tone changes. When I go to any interview I wear my best professional attire, nice shoes, do my hair and my nails makeup but no matter how nice I dress I can’t hide the fact that I am FAT.

Thus year I had gone to an interview for a laboratory technician job. As I walked up to my interviewer lets call her “Bertha.” Bertha gave me an obvious look of disgust. Then she proceeded to race me through multiple corridors and stairways. I was in heels she had comfortable “nurse” shoes on, but I kept up with her. At the conference room I was introduced to another man, “Joe” and women, “Jane” who was also to be part of interview process. Jane asked me the questions, while the Joe took notes and Bertha sat there looking disinterested. When the questions where done Bertha cut off Jane in mid-sentence and said ‘we usually give applicants a tour of the labs but were expecting an audit (inspection) sometime this month and want to keep the labs clear” Jane gave a blank stare for a moment then chided in oh yes an audit. One might assume Joe a mute except I did here him speak once when he bid me goodbye. Where as I was escorted out through the maze and given a very cold and insincere good bye from Bertha. I later learned there is an entrance that goes directly to the conference center. So why was I treated in such an unpleasant way?  Did “Bertha” based solely on my looks decide that I would not suitable to hired, but still was forced to go through the formalities of an interview so she would torture me for her own amusement to make it clear she didn’t like FAT people? This is one of the worst of my interview nightmares but by no means the only one.

Why not just get a job at a grocery of fast food chain? I did. I worked for Meijer. That was horrible experience. On my application and at my initial interview I made it clear I had physical limitations but I was hired immediately anyhow because of previous Meijer expereince. No accommodations where made for me. After first week I was in so much pain and was tripping and stumbling constantly because my hips where giving out. I asked my manager about having a stool. I worked behind a counter and didn’t see why that was a problem. He didn’t give a reasonable explanation and refused. By second week I was in so much pain that all day I fantasized about taking the butcher knives and killing myself right there in Meijer so I wrote a letter of resignation/complaint to the head of my store and quit.
A little history to explain my hips; I had a defect in the growth of my hips as a child. The femur(s) literally started sliding out of the socket. This was “repaired” by placing screws in my hips. Except the right was screwed together crooked so I don’t have full rotation and other painful complication. It’s only been in the last five years where it’s actually affected my life and mobility. Before this the pain was manageable and I’d do anything anyone else could do and sometimes better. I could out dance my skinny friends in college and was a pretty decent soccer player.

2005 brought some unexpected health problems. For the first part of the year I was doing an exercise regime and trying to eat a healthy diet. Slowly I was losing weight until …
Late September when I suffered sudden onset severe abdominal pain. After urine & blood tests, pelvic exam and ct-scan it was decided I had a very angry infected appendix. It had swollen five times normal size. After three or four more doctors poking and prodding at me in the hospital I was sent to surgery. They tried to do the laparoscopic method but the surgeon “nicked” a blood vessel on the way in and had to open me up more to find it and stop it. Sometime between being sewn up and being sent to recovery the vein ruptured, I bled out all night then it sealed itself again. By Morning I had a grapefruit size mass from pooled blood protruding from my belly, very gross and painful. Every time they tried to make me stand up I’d faint. Even After the transfusion my blood count was only 2-3 point above the criteria for giving a transfusion. So my hospital stay was extended.
I was very, very anemic. Even after I was released from the hospital my recovery was excruciatingly slow.

link to pics result of apendectomy:

http://pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/angel_eyes_112876/album?.dir=d69a&.src=ph&store=&prodid=&.done=http%3a//pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/angel_eyes_112876/my_photos

A week after I returned home from the hospital I got the news that the pelvic exam they had performed on me showed I had pre-cancer cells. I had to go in for some painful test. The results so far show I have abnormal cell growth but the cells have not metastasized (become cancer) so I must go in every four months for retesting. I don’t know why they just don’t kill the cells now.

Money, Money, The lack of Money.
All these tests, hospital and doctor cost have added up to over $23,000. That currently I have no way to pay. No job equals no health insurance. Even government assistance is pretty nonexistent in the county I live in. I’ve applied twice just for medical coverage and have been denied. Even the hospital financial advisor gave an audible moan when I told her I lived in Livingston County.
The week between Christmas and New Year my car broke down while I visited My boyfriend, Rob.  Rob’s Brother in law was kind enough to repair the immediate problems for cost of parts. Which was only $40 but that was $4 more than I had. So Rob paid and even offered to cover $400 + more needed for rest of the work that needs to be done on my car in next few weeks or I’ll suffer dire consequences. I wish I could say I could come up with that money on my own in that time but I see no way possible except by accepting the “indecent proposal” a certain person offered me but I am not desperate enough to be adulterous to my beloved Rob.

This all seems quite miserable so where is the Mirth you ask? In my relationships with family, Boyfriend & friends.
My parents have been very good to me as all they are to all there children. In my time of need they took me back in to their home. Gave me shelter, food, sometimes cloths in exchange I became the domestic help I do much of the cooking, cleaning, laundry and help with minor home repairs/improvements, When I am not off visiting Rob. Currently I reside in the basement. This was also a very tough year for my eldest sisters family, Layoffs, loan debt etc. So my sister, brother in law and niece moved in to my parent’s home over the holiday. So I gave up my bedroom, but being moved to the basement was not a such a bad thing it may be a little cold but I like my dungeon space.

My boyfriend Rob has been wonderful I’ve never dated someone who loved me, encouraged me and spoiled me so much. He always knows how to make me laugh and I just feel safer and more content when with him. This past year he expanded my experience of music, movies, gaming, and computers and enlightened me in other ways.
In my life I had only gone to two concerts and I hadn’t really enjoyed them more due to the company I was with than the Music. 2005 changed that. This past summer Rob (with a few of his friends) took me along to Gigantour summer festival at the DTE Energy Theatre. http://www.gigantour.com/flash.html#main. There was the permanent outdoor pavilion stage and a second stage out in the parking lot. We had to run back and forth from the two stages to see all the performances. It was incredibly hot I must have drank a gallon of diet soda and water, I got sunburned mostly on my cleavage because I missed applying sun block there, I was sore and exhausted but I had a marvelous time, gladly go again.
In October he took me to Palace of Auburn Hills for the U2 Vertigo concert. http://www.u2-vertigo-tour.com/show1331.html. We were in the removable nose bleed last row seats, they literally brought in seats, set them behind the last row and that’s were we sat. So it was hard enough to see over peoples heads when they sat and nearly impossible when they were all standing. We made do by standing in our chairs to see over people.  The music was excellent and the visuals of the show pretty spectacular of the little I could actually see. The buddy who purchased all our tickets for the U2 concert is banned from buying group tickets anymore. Despite the difficulty in viewing I still had a fantastic time.

I’d like to make mention of the old high school friends who contacted me to renew ties this past year, especially Amy, Karen and Tara. One can never have too many friends and it was nice to catch up and share the new experiences of our lives now.

Thanks to all my rea ltime friend and my cyber world friends your kind words, and encouraging support have meant a great deal to me. It still amazes me that people can become friends just from typed words and pics.
Well that’s the end of my review. Believe it or not that was the concise version.
I hope 2006 brings us all much more mirth than misery. Fare well for now.

Welcome

Why Hello there stranger. What brought you to my blog? Ok, yes very cheesy but bare with me I am new to this blogging thing. It’s a work in progress.
Though I am not one who enthusiastically follows trends or conforms to normalcy it does seem everybody and there monkey(or whatever pet’s they have) is putting themselves out in cyber space So I thought I’d check it out too.
More is on the way, rants, pics, links to the odd and unusual as I become more familar with working my blog.